Wednesday, October 20, 2010

#3. Grow Something

About a year ago T & I bought a house. We, I wanted a backyard that didn’t back onto any other neighbours, and a garage – because I grew tired of cleaning snow off of my car in the winter. When I walked into the backyard I fell in love with The Tree. The Tree was huge, birds, squirrels, and chipmunks frequented the tree, and it provided so much shade to our back deck. I loved the tree.




Turns out the tree was dead. We didn’t learn this until we had bought the house and were raking the tree’s leaves when a neighbour came over and pointed out that the entire back half of the tree was hollow. How horrible could that really be? I mean the front of the tree that we see from the house looks alive – all is good right?

It was decided that the tree needed to come down, before it fell down and took out our house/fence/neighbours house etc. So in the spring I called around for some quotes. The first one came in at $2500!!! Insane – it’s a tree – the company said it was unsafe to climb as it was half hollow, and they would have to use chainsaws on poles. I should mention that you can’t get a truck into our back yard.

Anyway, I decided another quote was necessary - $1600, but that’s leaving all the wood behind that I would have to find someone to cut up and haul away, or $2000 to take the wood. At this point the rage is building – it’s a f#*king tree!!! Give me a chainsaw – wait, don’t do that, only bad things can happen.

I put off bringing the tree down; it’s just too damn expensive and besides all those little critters will lose their homes. I waited and waited for some wind storm or a bolt of lightening to bring it down for us – that’s what we have insurance for. I could use a new roof or a redesign of the back deck!! But as I can’t control the weather (horrible reality for someone with control issues), the tree was still standing as storm season came to a close.

Sitting at work bitching about my tree and how much I’d prefer if the money could be spent on clothes, furniture, or a trip, a co-worker mentioned a guy – someone who had done tree work for her years ago, but he was good and cheap. Luckily that guy passed his business down to his son, and that son quoted me $1300 to bring down the tree and remove everything, except some mulch. Done and DONE. Get that tree out of here before I have to rake its leaves!!!



So now the tree is gone. Yes, I know there are many other trees in the ravine, but they are not my trees. I want my own tree. So it’s time to grow something.

This past Saturday after speaking with various tree experts, and watching all the colors of the trees in the ravine turn from green to yellow, I decided I wanted something with bright red leaves in the backyard, so off I went to the local nursery.

And there was my tree. 50% off, and only $5 to deliver!





He’s an Autumn Blaze Maple. I call him Woody (not sure if he resembles Harrelson or Allen more?), and this weekend I’ll be staking him so that he’s not harmed over the winter. He’s small now, but I’m looking forward to watching him grow over the years.

Friday, October 15, 2010

#31 – Find your religion.

Here is the customary note stating these are my thoughts/views and I don’t mean and/or will not try to offend anyone. Apologies in advance if you are offended.


I am a very opinionated person but strongly believe that opinions and discussions about religion or politics should just be avoided.

I’ll start by saying I am not a religious person, nor do I plan to become one. Living by specific rules or beliefs set out by any one religion does not interest me. However, I see good aspects of many different religions.

I will put out there that any religion that states that being gay or lesbian should be looked down upon is not a religion I will support, and I will not support politicians who share that view also.

And if you’re sitting there thinking I’m not religious because I wasn’t ever properly introduced to it - you are wrong. As a child I went every Sunday to church with my family and my mother was a Sunday school teacher. As a teen where the choice became mine, I no longer attended. T & I chose not to be married in a church, and chose not to bring religion into the ceremony – we were married by a marriage commissioner. If we didn’t practice any one religion throughout our relationship, why would we choose one just to be married? Our marriage was about the level of commitment that we required from each other before major investments, and possibly children.

I don’t do things 'half-ass', it’s not who I am. So in order to say I’m this religion or that religion, and then make concessions because of my lifestyle that don’t fit the ‘rules’ of that religion, I believe that’s 'half-assing 'it.

My morals and values I didn’t learn in a church. I learned from them from my surroundings, people I respected, and trial and error. I am angered by those who try to force their religion on others, or those that that take their religion to the extreme to the point of terrorism. And also those who are so close minded to believe that their religion can only be the‘correct’ religion and not respect the beliefs of others.

I guess today I am just angered by negativity towards homosexuality and the recent suicides of gay youth, who are being bullied – not only by other youths- with beliefs passed down by ignorant parents, but also by adults with close-minded opinions stemmed from religion. Every person has a right to be on this earth and have the same opportunities as anyone else. If you are going to be one of those ignorant people, do the world a favour and keep your mouth shut. The deaths were all unnecessary.

I accept all religions and do not judge people on their individual views, and would expect the same in return. It’s too bad more people aren’t like that, and everyone could just coexist.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

#75. Collect correspondence with friends

I had every intention on sending out random ‘just because’ cards to all of my friends inviting them all to meet me individually when our schedules were open for a tea, coffee, or glass – who am I kidding, bottle of wine. But seriously folks, I just don’t have the time.


I’ve been feeling a little:



Lately. Mostly self-imposed, and a little overboard as here is the conversation between two people who correspond with me daily that I got brought into after they had determined I should be Santa.

From: Mary
Sent: Tuesday, October 05, 2010 10:27 AM
To: Cassondra
Subject: J9

Is freaking insane!!!! She just told us she was addressing Christmas cards last night. Seriously, we need to do an intervention!


From: Cassondra
Sent: October 5, 2010 10:28 AM
To: Mary
Subject: RE: J9

Oh, I went shopping in the States with her, we looked at every Christmas section.

From: Mary
Sent: Tuesday, October 05, 2010 10:31 AM
To: Cassondra
Subject: RE: J9

Shopping for Christmas stuff is one thing, addressing your cards in October is just nuts!!! Lol


From: Cassondra
Sent: October 5, 2010 10:33 AM
To: Mary
Subject: RE: J9

Yeah I know- she’s a little wacky but we love her.


From: Mary
Sent: Tuesday, October 05, 2010 10:35 AM
To: Cassondra
Subject: RE: J9

Yes, we do. We have to find a way to harness her powers for the benefit of all mankind!


From: Cassondra
Sent: October 5, 2010 10:47 AM
To: Mary
Subject: RE: J9

We could make her Santa Clause


From: Mary
Sent: October 5, 2010 10:48 AM
To: Cassondra
Subject: RE: J9

Knowing her, she could probably find a way to do a better job than Santa!


Yup, Crazy – that’s me. I also correspond with two other friends almost daily via email, as I don’t write letters or notes much anymore unless they are on a post-it.

The other emails sent today probably shouldn’t be published – it is a lot of ‘can you believe T did this’, and ‘did you see that?’, and ‘I can’t stand….’.

However, after the last post (that I emailed promptly to my best friend) I received:

From: kim
Sent: October 6, 2010 12:24 PM
To: J9
Subject: RE: Blog

Holy sappy batman...


actually made me tear up!



SUCKER :)

#12. Know your friends family tree

Ever become such good friends with someone their house becomes an open door policy – even if it is their parent’s house? At some points in your youth you saw their parents more than you saw your own? The phrase ‘run to the Hills’ is exactly what happened every time I was happy, sad, or needed to escape.


Once after saying goodbye to my high school boyfriend (he was moving away for university), instead of driving home and crying all night, I drove to my best friends as I knew it would be comforting, and entertaining, and they wouldn’t let me wallow in self-pity. I’m pretty sure I stayed a few days.

As I would never have to knock at their house (if I did, I’d probably be made fun of), I’d always wander through the garage where her dad would always be working on his air boat or lawn mower, or anything else mechanical. If he wasn’t in the garage you knew a Red Wings game had to be on, and there you could find him on the couch making ‘doo-doo-doo’ noises that could be heard clear across the neighbourhood. He was always smiling, and you couldn't help but be in a better mood around him.

Her mom would let us take over her kitchen at all times when we decided we needed to make taco dip or whatever else we wanted to make at all hours of the day/night. She always had a place for me at the dinner table, and didn’t bat an eye when I’d show up and stay for a few days. She would sit and listen to all of our crazy stories and roll her eyes at us, but always handed us the keys to a vehicle so we could keep going.

Her sisters (one older, one younger), aided in our adventures. One was very much Martha Stewart-ish, the other was a free spirit. The friends of the sisters somewhat overlapped so the house was often a popular place to be. Numerous nights of euchre in high school were played at their kitchen table. After my next major break up a few years later while living in TO, I again ran for the Hills – and ended up crying on the older sister’s couch. She gave me the support my best friend couldn’t due to distance, and helped me back up onto my feet again. Of course, I still ended up back on my best friends couch in the city I decided to move back to.

The extended family I have met over the years. Amazing fish frys at her grandparents, the chlorine in her aunt’s pool giving my hair a greenish tinge, and her uncle always at Tim Horton’s. I have heard stories from numerous family Christmas’ or weddings. When she mentions a relative I know exactly where they are and what part of the family they belong to.

You’ll notice that most of this is written past tense. It is only because my best friend and I haven’t lived in our home town for 10 years, so I only now maybe visit her parent’s house once per year, if even that. Life gets too busy, and there is never enough time. As much as I don’t see them anymore, I still feel very much a part of them as I get updates on them daily. And if life ever hands it to me and I’m back in my home town, I know I am always welcome to run to the Hills.