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Still reading? Fine. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Let me tell you about the weekend of pussy maintenance.
I never really understood the need to wax the vajay-jay? I myself don’t like to voluntarily sign myself up for anyone poking around in lady town. Am I wrong in thinking that all women hate their yearly gyno appointments that we partake in for health reasons? Getting waxed is basically the same position (minus the stirrups) only a different type of torture.
This body had not seen wax anywhere before. That’s right, I’ll occasionally pluck my eyebrows, but after watching what other women have put themselves through, and the redness the ensued after, I decided I could live with the eyebrows I was born with. I am a fan of the razor, I mean; you’re shaving your legs anyway right?
Now about waxing the vajay-jay. What are the benefits of spending $$, and voluntarily putting yourself through pain? Well you can proudly do somersaults in a bikini and not have to worry about any embarrassing situations in the nether regions – you know because I do those all the time. You free up the time taken in your normal routine to shave. It’s a cleaner feeling, and is maybe a little more sensitive to different fabrics, and the skin is very very smooth.
The cons to waxing. Well for one, it’s downright painful – however, not as bad as I had expected. Before proceeding with the waxing I asked my hairdresser what to expect and the response I got was “you know when you rip Band-Aids off?”. Well guess what? I don’t rip Band-Aids off because it’s too damn painful. I wait until I’m in the shower and then soak them and they slide right on off. Another con would be the ‘growth’ period you have to go through prior to the waxing so you have enough hair to make it worth it. At the beginning it’s down right itchy and after a week if you’re not into the full bush look, then you don’t even want to look at yourself in the mirror. And if you don’t feel sexy then……
My aesthetician was awesome. You have to go one of two ways here. Go with someone you know really well, or someone you don’t know at all, seems as they’ll be all up in your business and pain tolerance in women is completely different. My aesthetician has been my hairstylist for years and she received and answered many e-mails in the weeks leading up to the appointment asking “when do I stop shaving”, “can I take extra strength Aleve before?”, “Is being hung over going to make it worse? Or should I just stay drunk from the night before?” She gave me a pillow to scream into if I needed it, and made the entire situation humorous.
You know how on TV you see them place one big strip of wax paper down and then rip it off. Well, that’s exactly what happens. Afterwards there is a throbbing and a burning sensation, but you believe the aesthetician is applying pressure to relieve the pain. 100% WRONG. She’s going back for left over hairs and doing as many “after rips” that she needs to finish the area. Those – you don’t see coming, and they are worse than the initial rip as you don’t know how many there will be?
As I can’t really show images of the wax ordeal -I will show you a picture of Banditt who experienced a shaving experience this weekend instead of a waxing one:
Will I ever go through with waxing again? It's still undetermined. I have to wait and see how long the 'results' last, and then maybe do some research on laser hair removal - it's gotta be less painful right?
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